What Made You Smile Today?

[Ian]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gcaq4ElAJrE&feature=related

[fish]

I remember that one, so funny.

[snaps]

I'm in lurrrve. OK. I'll rephrase that. Someone's in lurrve with me. He's such a sweet guy, just graduated from Uni this year, talks the talk etc. .. never loses an opportunity to check in here see that everything is alright I'm really rather taken with him. He's polite, masterful, sensitive and yeh he's a ...... cop! It looks like he has been making some discreet enquiries among the stable girls (the most indiscreet bunch of harpies you could ever wish to meet ) and they have been feeding him a line. I mean c'mon. Me and the law? I think I would have a few things to explain Nevermind the parking tickets, the mind boggelz I just have the feeling that trying to hook up with me may not be the best career move he's ever likely to make. He's welcome to take down my particulars probe further and maybe cuff me and stuff me but there has to be a limit. and yes it's OK I've already had the joshin from the stable animals about taking a tap from his truncheon and polishing his helmet, so let's get the smutty innuendos outta the way, like I tolerate that kinda thang I need an exit strategy I love the guy to bits but face it this is as doomed as the Titanic.

[Ian]

My sympathy runneth somewhat short today, alas, Snaps, when it's been 13 years since anyone showed any signs of the mental illness that is being-in-love-with-me.

And she wasn't my type.

[fish]

.....so let's get the smutty innuendos outta the way.....

Typical, just when we fancy our chances you want to get it on with the guy with the big truncheon.

So snapsie's in lurrrve. I think that's sweet.
Just pick out a nice deckchair, crank up the volume on Deborah Conway, and go for it.


And Ian,

...she wasn't my type.

You really need to lower your standards, don't you?

[Ian]

Apparently.

Of course, I was also completely smitten with someone else on the same course at the same time. Who never looked at me twice, of course.

[fish]

Isn't that always the way?
People in lurrrve must give off certain pheromones which make them attractive to third parties who you just wish would wait their turn till you can pay them more attention but they don't because by then the pheromones have gone and they just wonder what they saw in you anyway and you're just like, wtf just happened? Did I miss something?

[snaps]

Typical, just when we fancy our chances you want to get it on with the guy with the big truncheon.
And Ian,

...she wasn't my type.

You really need to lower your standards, don't you?

Well I can assure you his truncheon is standard issue, but his nightstick is something else

Yes Ian, lower your standards, get yourself a mail-order bride from England!

As for pheromones, round here most of ours are masked with the sweet odour of horse.

[fish]

...Well I can assure you his truncheon is standard issue, but his nightstick is something else

Oh dear, I may have mistakenly asked for too much information here.

As for pheromones, round here most of ours are masked with the sweet odour of horse.

Eau de ewe is one that's very enticing too.

[Ian]

http://costarica-vacation-getaway.com/static/5/197/static.html

Now then... who do you think wrote that?

[fish]

Now then... who do you think wrote that?

I take it you're talking first person singular here.
Are you meaning the book or the webpage copy or the webpage itself?
Are you a mega-millionaire yet?
Can I be your agent?
Is my cheque in the mail?

[Ian]

The book.


Somehow I think my mega millionaire days are a way off yet, mind.

[snaps]

Now then... who do you think wrote that?

Where's that bowing down in awe emoticon when you need it!

[Ian]

I'll settle for a snuddle, snaps.

It sounds more impressive than it is, really, you know.

[snaps]

hehehe! That's almost worth a snoggle